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Browns

Browns v Bengals Friday Game Tape; Hey The First Half Was OK!

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Well. Alright. We knew coming into the game that the Browns would have to be nearly perfect and Andy Dalton would have to revert to his “Primetime Dalton” form. Unfortunately neither of those things happened and the Browns got beat like a drum while Andy Dalton played very well. The writing was on the wall and like the idiot I am, I talked myself into thinking the Browns could pull off a win (I’ll do this every game, mind you)… Short week after getting embarrassed by the Cardinals in the second half on Sunday, Johnny Manziel under center, not much time to prepare, playing an undefeated Bengals team on the road, injuries, etc etc. Thursday night games favor the team that’s better and the Bengals are just a better football team than the Browns.

Hope you took Cincinnati in your survivor pool.

Let’s look at the game tape.

 

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Jim Brown gave us a little history about our once proud franchise

Johnny showing love to our servicemen before the game

 

Joel Bitonio might want to fast forward this one when the o-line is in the film room. Woof.

Vontaze Burfict proved he’s a mega tough guy when he took out a camera

Randy Starks made the best play he’s made as a Brown so far… but then got called for taunting. He also jumped offsides on a crucial 4th down that led to a Bengals touchdown. Not the best series (game/season) for Mr. Starks.

Flushed out of the pocket. Runs right. Throws lasers for 6. Impressive 92 yard scoring drive from Johnny before the first half ended.

And he mixed some LeBron + Cristiano Ronaldo to create the hottest celebration we’ve seen a Cleveland athlete do in some time

And Tony Grossi was wrong per usual

grossiwrongasalways

Tha half ended and the Browns went into the locker room trailing 14-10. Not a bad first half for the Browns offense and not a terrible effort from the Browns defense. That’s it, right? The game is over? We’ll just pretend the second half didn’t happen and pretend like second half adjustments don’t exist and coaches don’t have to make them. Yeah, let’s do that.

Hey Leon Hall, you just got ran over by a Mack truck

Prime example why Joe Thomas is the best. Even his opponents respect the hell out of him enough to seek him out and say “sorry”

Nice to see Dwayne Bowe awake on the sidelines

The wide receivers… they showed up.

Tramon Williams bit HARD on a double move by a tight end. Knew this was a TD right when Dalton was mid pump fake.

https://twitter.com/TheCauldron/status/662478264011776000

The Bengals ran a reverse. Pretty sure most of us non-NFLers learned how to defend this play in high school but I digress.

Second half Browns highlights!!

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Couple quick thoughts

  • The decision/inability to not get Duke Johnson involved in the past 2 second halves is absolutely mind boggling.
  • The Browns attempted one run with a running back in the second half. Nice. That’s the recipe for your young quarterback to succeed.
  • Danny Shelton? He showed up again.
  • I never want to see Armonty Bryant cover a team’s starting wide receiver for as long as I live.
  • Do the Browns have a soft defense? Through 9 games I can count on one hand how many hard hits they’ve had. There’s not one player in our front 7 who an opposing team would look at and think “we’ve gotta run away from that guy.”
  • Really concerning when the Browns offensive line gives up a sack to a three man rush
  • Jim O’Neil doesn’t deserve to have this job.
  • Dwayne Bowe sighting! Don’t let Dwayne Bowe get hot! If you had “Week 9” in your “When will Dwayne Bowe catch his first pass with the Browns,” you win.
  • Hey wide receivers, CATCH THE FUCKING BALL
  • Also, receivers over 5’11 would be so cool right now
  • I think too much is being made about Mike Pettine’s comments before halftime. Obviously he’s not sabotaging his quarterback on purpose by forcing him to play in the pocket. But c’mon, Mike. Turn the kid loose a little more. If you want to win, let Johnny spin.
  • With his job on the line, Mike Pettine has been leery to hand the keys to the franchise over to Johnny Manziel… unfortunately for Mike Pettine, Johnny Manziel may be the only one who can keep Pett’s job.

 

I’ll let Marshall Faulk play us out

https://twitter.com/Bottlegate/status/662486211404111872/video/1

Browns

The Cincinnati Bengals and the Cleveland Orchestra trolled the Browns today

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The Bengals posted this tweet earlier in the day. What could it be?!?

bengals1 bengals2 bengals3

Hilarious joke! Super timely and topical too. Those Bengals always on top of their game I tell ya.

But that’s not rock bottom. That’s just a team ripping on a division rival. No big deal really. What’s really concerning is when a city’s OWN ORCHESTRA trolls that city’s professional football team.

orchestra

Sigh.

We throw around “rock bottom” about every other day when you’re a Browns fan.  This….. might be rock bottom. When you’ve become such a joke in your own city that even flute players and cello strummers are making fun of you, it’s time to look in the mirror.

Whatever. 13 days till the uniform reveal.

Browns

Browns v Bengals Monday Game Tape: I’m Only Human

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Oh, the Browns played yesterday? I’m sorry I was too busy focused on this puppy

And this NBA team

And this Buckeyes team playing in the CFB Playoff January 1st vs Nick Saban and Alabama

It was a good run, boys. At 7-7 the Browns the door has all but mathematically been closed on the 2014 season

(gif choice: A++)

There are 2 games left in this Browns season. A team that was at one point 6-3 has a very real chance to finish the season at 7-9. Woof. Cue the music and let’s look at the game tape:

 

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Alright, that was fun

Here is a highlight that didn’t have anything to do with the game:

Annnndddd… that’s it. Sweet game tape, huh?

 

 

Thoughts:

-HE’S A BUST!! A BUST I TELL YOU! CUT HIM! HE’S A BUST!!! Good God I hope no one listens to the callers on Cleveland sports talk radio today.

Alright, hear me out. I want you to temper your emotions and expectations for a sec and remove the name off the back of the jersey… You’re left with a barely 22 year old kid making his first NFL start as a rookie vs. a division leading team who’s fighting for their playoff lives. You mean to tell me that 22 year old kid struggled and didn’t play well? I’M SHOCKED!!!!!

Now I’m not going to sugarcoat it; Johnny played awful. It was a very underwhelming performance for a game with so much hype. But people already writing him off after ONE GAME saying he doesn’t have what it takes to make it in the NFL? Get the fuck out of here. It’s laughable really. I saw so many Twitter quarterback gurus yesterday my head almost exploded. If you took joy in seeing him struggle yesterday go take a good long hard look in the mirror.

– This team has so many flaws you can’t pin this loss on just the quarterback. When you can’t run, block, catch, throw, tackle… you can’t win.

– Josh Gordon. Where you at, man? Your first game back you showed flashes of dominance and looked like you hadn’t missed a beat. The past 3 games you’ve been a compete non-factor. Someone with those physical gifts shouldn’t disappear in games like he has. I don’t know if it’s on Josh, on the OC, or on the quarterbacks. Something isn’t right there.

– Jeremy Hill is a chump. A talented runner but an asshole. I also put him on the bench for my fantasy team. Should’ve swallowed my pride, his 27 points would’ve propelled me to the championship game. Oh well I suck again.

– When are kick returner tryouts? I think me and my 4.85 speed could make some things happen (probably more like 5.4 after 3 months of a sedentary lifestyle trying to get Bottlegate off the ground)

– Manziel, Hoyer, Montana, Favre… I don’t think any QB yesterday wins that game. The QB had the deck stacked against him from the beginning and all 21 other players did nothing to help that position out.

– That first drive was an absolute soul crusher. With the way that stadium was buzzing beforehand and all the pregame hype, Coach Pettine HAS to take the ball first.

– On the first drive the Bengals had those penalties were game changers. Especially the Mingo late hit.

– I expected to see way more rollouts from Manziel and designed QB runs. I thought they’d try to run most of their passing plays outside of the pocket. I was wrong. I wasn’t thrilled with the game Shanahan called either.

– There were 2 QBs on the field yesterday. One was the rookie Johnny Manziel. The other one was veteran Andy Dalton who just signed a six year $115 million contract. I honestly don’t know which team has a worse QB situation.

– This one hurt. A lot. I was in the Muni Lot before the game and one of my old high school teammate’s mom gave me a wad of fake money to throw after Johnny threw or ran a touchdown. The money was never thrown… The money was never thrown. (Yeah I’m a tool w/e)

– Run defense, run defense, run defense. Woof.

– Guys, Johnny was never going to come in and rescue this franchise overnight. It’s going to take time whether you want to hear it or not. He’s only one player. He’s only one man.

– I still care, Johnny. I still care.

-HE’S OOONNLLYYY HUUMMAANNN!!

-MUSIC PLAY ME OUT!!

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PS- If you think this game changed my stance about whether I think Johnny is going to be a good quarterback you’re out of your god damn mind. Maybe it’s me being stubborn or an idiot, but I have all the confidence in the world in Johnny Manziel. I’m living or dying with him. I’m not flip flopping like every other person in Cleveland sports media. I truly believe he’s going to be a successful pro once he gets everything figured out. It may not be pretty at times but you knew that when you drafted him. If you’re jumping off the ship after his first start, good. We don’t want you.