Category Archives: Cleveland

Monday – 1, Fox 8 News Cleveland – 0

February 23, 2015 Ai Leave a comment

So Monday has been..not great so far for your boys and girls over at Fox 8. First, anchorette Kristi Capel dropped a hard J bomb when talking about Lady Gaga’s performance last night…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3RIX3fF2VU

Then they went LIVE to Melissa Reid, who was brave enough to step outside in frigid Rome, Ohio to probably tell us how cold it is…

Oy. Vey. The green screen is just good clean humor. I’m sure news stations do that shit all the time, they just happened to have god awful timing for getting caught. It’s like stealing signs in baseball. Everyone knows everyone else is doing it, but don’t get caught unless you want to catch a 19 Action News fastball right to the kidney.

As for Kristi….if we’re being 100% honest I had to Google “jigaboo”. I had no idea it was a slur. Clearly she didn’t either, as evidenced by her REPEATING in on live television. I love me some news anchor slip ups as much as the next guy, but when they accidentally say something they shouldn’t on air, they don’t repeat it for clarification. I’m certainly not saying it was okay, but c’mon people. It’s Monday. Put out the torches, lay down the pitch forks and breathe a little bit.

Nah fug it.

PS This is, and always will be, the best on-air moment of all time

Cleveland

Cleveland man can’t stop won’t stop; gets arrested for the 109th time

February 19, 2015 Mike Leave a comment

From Cleveland.com

SOUTH EUCLID, Ohio — A 50-year-old Cleveland man has racked up 109 arrests in Cuyahoga County as of Monday when he was accused of stealing teeth whitening products from a South Euclid CVS.

Nathaniel Ferguson’s lengthy criminal career began in 1984 at the age of 31 and consists mainly of robbery, theft and drug charges. He’s been accused in crimes in East Cleveland, Euclid, Beachwood, Richmond Heights and Chagrin Falls.

South Euclid police Monday found he had seven active warrants, including three in their department. He was also wanted by police in Cleveland Heights, University Heights and Highland Heights — and by the Cuyahoga County Sheriff’s Office.

***

109 times, huh? I’m not even mad, that’s amazing. His first arrest came in 1984 when he was 31, so in 19 years he’s been arrested 109 times. That’s almost 6 arrests per year! An arrest every two months… and that’s not even counting the time he spent in jail. Just an unreal spree of crime. People have their vices. Some are addicted to booze, some are addicted to gambling, maybe Nathaniel is just addicted to getting arrested? Maybe he’s just an adrenaline junkie? What better way to get a shot of adrenaline than to hear sirens and see red & blue flashing lights chasing you. That’ll get ya jacked up.

At what point do you take a step back and not blame the guy but blame the system that allows someone to go to jail OVER A HUNDRED TIMES and still lets them out on the street to commit crime after crime after crime? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 109 times, shame on….?

Do you think the officers down at the station just treat this as you would if one of your annoying relatives was stopping by your house unannounced? “Ugh, hi Nathaniel. Nice to see you again. Yeah my kids are doing fine. Your room is ready”

Followed by a “See you soon” as he’s getting released.

UPDATE: The math in the first paragraph is completely wrong. Don’t blame us, blame Cleveland.com since they’re actually real journalists.

Cleveland

The city of Cleveland is erecting a Superman statue… Plus the Top 5 people who deserve a statue downtown

February 12, 2015 Mike Leave a comment

From Cleveland.com

CLEVELAND, Ohio – Looks like Cleveland will be getting a Superman statue — finally.

A larger-than-life statue of a flying Superman is on track to be erected near the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum as part of the elevated walkway that will connect downtown Cleveland to the lakefront.

The statue will be about five miles from the Glenville neighborhood where Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster created Superman in the early 1930s.

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Images via Cleveland.com

Love this. Philly has the Rocky statue, Detroit has that weird fist thing, and Cleveland has the… Free Stamp. Honestly, is the Free Stamp the worst statue representative of a city ever? “Hey, welcome to Cleveland, the birthplace of… this big stamp!”

This got the ball rolling and I started to think “If I were to put a statue up downtown, which people would be most deserving to have a statue made of them?

The Top 5 people who deserve their own staue in downtown Cleveland

5. Halle Berry

Born and raised in Bedford. A-List Hollywood actress. Preferably the statue would be molded just how she looked as she was sitting by the pool in the movie Swordfish

4. The Cast of A Christmas Story

Obvious choice here. Have the whole family standing next to the infamous leg lamp… or recreate the scene where Ralphie beats the shit out of that dickhead Scut Farcus.

3. Charles Ramsey

Imagine a 10 foot tall statue of Charles Ramsey holding a bag full of Big Macs. That’s a world I want to live in.

2. Superpimp

A fixture downtown on a weekend night. Superpimp is a god damn local treasure. If we’re being honest I’m not really sure why the below picture already isn’t a statue at the corner of West 6th and St. Clair.

1. Dick Goddard

Dick Motherfucking Goddard. The Wizard of Weather. The King of Caterpillars. The Knight of Northeast Ohio. Dick’s statue would 100% be of him riding on the back of a Woolybear like that flying dog thing in a Neverending Story.