Category Archives: ohio

ohio

VIDEO: Get A Load Of These Guys In Santa Hats Water Skiing On Lake Erie In December

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Water skiing in December??? I love me some good old fashioned global warming. If this climate change becomes a permanent thing then sign me the fuck up. 60’s in December and January? Yeah, that’s something I can get down with. If we can get Spring temperatures in the Winter then I’ll gladly quadruple my Carbon Footprint for the cause. It’s only right.

With these recent warm temperatures sweeping our state maybe you took your dog for a few walks, maybe you had a bonfire, maybe you went to a bar and sat on a patio and drank some beer… but not these guys. They got their wetsuits, boat, skis, and put words into action by plopping their boat into Lake Erie and shredding some tasty waves.

45 degree water? Whatevs, watch this:

waterski

Check out Millennium Force and Top Thrill Dragster in the background

cp

h/t Cleveland Scene

ohio

Ohioans Use The Word “Bonfires” More Than Any Other State In Their Dating Profiles. Lame.

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Via Mashable

In the world of online dating, there is a seemingly endless virtual line of potential dates standing outside your virtual door. But sifting through an infinite number of matches can feel like a slog when every profile contains the phrases, “easy going,” “dog lover” and “I like everything except country, lol.”

But though it sometimes seems like every dating profile is the same, there are clear distinctions that separate American daters in each state from one another.

Mashable asked Match.com to analyze thousands of online dating profiles from the U.S., and to offer insight into the habits and interests of daters in each state. Essentially, they broke down which words are used with relative frequency in certain states, as compared to relative infrequency in the rest of the country. For example, Texas love its “oil,” New York loves a stimulating visit to the “museum,” and Mississippi loves “lookin.”

bonfires

 

ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzZzzzzzzZZZZzzzzzzZzzzzzzZZZzZzZ

BOOOORRRIIINNNGGG!

When did Ohio become the most basic state in the country? Do we enjoy Starbucks, Northface jackets, and Ugg boots too? Did the Match.com profiles they looked at only belong to 17 year junior girls in high school?

Look, I’m as pro-bonfire as they come. Gathering wood, slugging a few beers, maybe bring a radio out and listen to a game or some tunes… all great things. But c’mon, everyone loves bonfires. Putting “I like bonfires” in my dating profile is the same as putting “I like food and music.” Everyone likes food and music, it goes without saying. You need to put stuff that stands out in your profile and “bonfires” ain’t cutting it.

Besides, who uses Match.com anyway? It’s all about Tinder now.

ohio, USA

The “kissing bug” is a lot more horrifying than it sounds

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kissing-bug

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From Cleveland.com:

“A potentially deadly disease carried by the “kissing bug” has made its way into more than half of the United States.

The inch-long triatomine bug is called the “kissing bug” because it has a habit of feeding on blood by biting around the lips and faces of people while they sleep, CNN reported.

It’s not the bite that’s deadly, but rather the bug’s other unfortunate habit of defecating on the bite afterward. Some kissing bugs are infected with the parasite Trypanosoma cruzi, which can be transmitted in the fecal material, and cause the potentially deadly Chagas disease.

Chagas disease most often causes flu-like symptoms like fever, body aches and vomiting. However, 20-30 percent of those infected with the disease can contract chronic conditions, including difficulty breathing, chest pains and sudden death. WECT-TV reports that these symptoms can remain dormant for up to 20 years.”

So just to run through that again real quick…the kissing bug is about an inch long, bites people, shits on their face and/or in their mouths, and can give you a deadly disease that can be dormant in your body for up to 20 years.

Nope.

What a dickhead this kissing bug is. Exactly no parts of its existence are okay. At one inch, it’s not enormous but any bug I can tell is a bug immediately without squinting and asking “Is that a bug?” deserves to die. It bites around your face and lips. I got chills just typing that sentence picturing one of these assholes crawling on my face. They then SHIT IN THE BITE HOLE THEY JUST MADE. What. Part. Of. That. Is. Okay? Plain and simple, in the animal kingdom, if you shit on the face of another living being, your entire species deserves to die a thousand deaths. Can you imagine some psychopath guy walking around biting people and pooping on their faces? In their mouths? Ghandi would buy a glock on the black market and ship it to Mother Teresa so she could put a clip into him herself. And I thought the morning anxiety I get after a night of drinking was bad…I’m going to wake up wondering if a bug bit and shit on me every morning for the rest of my life. Thanks, Obama.

Talk about gun control and taxes and walls all you want, 2016 presidential candidates, but if you want this blogger’s vote, eradicate the balls out of the kissing bug.