Tag Archives: Cleveland Cavaliers

Cavs-Celtics Game 1 Monday Game Tape

Ah, Monday Game Tapes are baby, baby! It’s going to be a quick one today since I was at the game and these are almost impossible to do if you’re not keeping a running post while watching the game at home (fire up the excuse train CHOO CHOO).

The Cavs came out and did what they needed to do to take a 1-0 series lead. Obviously emotions were high and it showed in the first quarter but once everyone slowed down it was smooth sailing from there.

Kyrie dropped 30, Kevin added 19 & 12, LeBron had a ho hum 20, 7, & 6, Tristan Thompson seemed like he was everywhere, and Kelly Olynyk’s bloody eye gave us all nightmares.

Here are your highlights:

The Q was rocking during pregame intros. I’m a sucker for those light up glow sticks that they hand out

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I’m pretty sure our section collectively pissed our pants during this K-Love hook pass to LeBron for a fast break dunk. LeBron also gave Evan Turner a staredown that even made me a little nervous for Evan’s well being.

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During halftime some dude stood on about 20 metal chairs and did handstands and stuff. It was thrilling, exhilarating and I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. What a showman.

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Joe Haden was very concerned during the performance

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Playoff scrums are the best scrums

His name is James Jones and he’s been here before (peep K. Love’s reaction on the bench)

Mozgov took a shot right to his huge Russian nuts. Poor guy.

Something weird happened to Kelly Olynyk’s eye and GOO!!

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Couple quick thoughts:

-The energy at the Q was slightly above average. I’m pretty sure it’s because Boston isn’t that great but you’d think the first playoff game in Cleveland in forever would have warranted a little more excitement.

– I was in the same section as Jared Sullinger’s family. Before I knew who he was I HATED Jared’s brother JJ. Our section wasn’t too fond of him either. I found out it was JJ about midway through the 3rd quarter and felt bad for the things I was thinking. Former Buckeye, gotta respect that.

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– LeBron’s gotta feel pretty good about not having to do any of the heavy lifting this game. If he can rely on Kyrie and Kevin for these early series and coast through these games, I think we’ll see a very healthy and springy LeBron come ECF and Finals time.

– If I’m Brad Stevens I’m not taking Isaiah Thomas out of the game. I don’t think there’s really any Cavs player on the roster who could do a great job of guarding him. He’s a waterbug.

– The girl who sang the National Anthem absolutely CRUSHED it. Great story too if you get a chance to read up on it.

– Gotta love Shawn Marion. Comes in for 30 seconds and gets 2 crucial steals at the end of the 3rd quarter.

– Hopefully JR Smith can stay out of foul trouble. Definitely need to see more of him.

– Saw Marcus Smart catch an elbow to the face and it made my heart all warm and fuzzy.

All in all it was a great first playoff win for Kevin Love, Kyrie Irving and co. One down, fifteen more to go. Like I said, this was going to be a short Game Tape, we’ll be better for game 2. Promise.

(vines via @gifdsports and @fansidedgif)

It’s time.

This is it. This is the day we’ve been waiting for since a certain Sports Illustrated article was published on July 11th, 2014. The 82 game preseason was fun but this is where it counts.

Everything that’s happened in the last 50 years means nothing starting today. The heartbreak, the defeat, the agony will all be forgotten starting at 3 pm.

All year we’ve had to deal with the bullshit fabricated stories and agendas spewed out by the national media. Do LeBron and Kevin Love have beef? Did you see that subtweet? Is David Blatt in over his head? Was that a shove? Did you see who was and wasn’t in that Instagram picture? Can Kyrie’s style of play co-exist with LeBron? Why isn’t this newly formed team with 10 new players going 82-0?

Fuck the national media. Fuck ESPN. Fuck Bill Simmons. Fuck Skip Bayless. Fuck Stephen A. Smith. Fuck Boston. Fuck Chicago. Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Golden State. Fuck San Antonio. It’s Cleveland against the world and if you’re not with us, you’re against us.

In Northeast Ohio, nothing is given. Everything is earned.

Let’s go.

 

 

The top reasons to hate the Boston Celtics and the entire Boston fanbase if you’re a Cavs fan

If you’ve been following along with Bottlegate you’ll know that sports hate is one of our main themes on the site. It’s healthy to keep your hate sharp in sports. Whether it’s hating Oregon in the National Champioship or you’re hating Wisconsin Whitewater if you’re a Mount Union fan, hate keeps the world spinning.

Our first Playoff Hate Mode victim is the Boston Celtics and the entire Boston fanbase. My personal opinion is that Boston fans are the most unbearable on Earth. They whine, they bitch, they have a superiority complex and they talk like dolts.

Here we go. All aboard the hate train CHOO CHOO!!

 

Bill Simmons

 

I used to like Bill Simmons. I really did. He used to be the “average Joe sports fan” and he was great at it. But a couple years at ESPN, a couple years living in LA, and a couple few thousand celebrity name drops in his columns have rendered him completely unbearable.

This was his reaction after the Cavs won the NBA Lottery last year. Shut up Bill. If you’re not with us, you’re against us and Bill Simmons is definitely not with us.

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Keep your hate sharp and keep hating Bill

 

Marcus Smart

 

If you like rooting against dirty players who purposely punch guys in the dick, then Marcus Smart is the man for you!

Marcus Smart Ejected After Punching Matt Bonner In The Balls

If you like rooting against renowned floppers, then Marcus Smart is the man for you!

I guarantee Marcus Smart catches one on the chin this series. The dude is a punk ass, has been since college. Before the draft last year he said in an interview he’d like to play against LeBron James. When he got drafted by the Celtics last year he reiterated the same thing.

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 Well Marcus you get your chance on Sunday and I hate you.

This fucking kid

 

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Screw you dude. You don’t even know what it feels like to be a real fan. You’re a teenager and you’ve never experienced the pain of defeat. You take those parades for granted you spoiled prick.

Hate on a hundred thousand trillion

 

The Boston fanbase

 

The Boston fanbase manages to simultaneously sport superiority AND inferiority complexes. You can’t have it both ways. They used to be the blue collar, underdog fans of sports. Now they’re the whiny crybaby fanbase. Bitching about Deflategate, Simmons bitching about the NBA Lottery. Shut up you Beantown pricks, just shut up. You can’t have it both ways. Either you’re still the gritty fans, or you’re the sissy nancyboy fans… You’re definitely the latter.

And I hate you all.

 

The Bostonian

 

If you’ve ever listened to a sports talk radio show in the Cleveland area, chances are you’ve heard this guy. With his annoying Boston accent he’s been a fixture on the Cleveland airwaves for as long as I can remember. Most Clevelanders hate him, I happen to think he’s hilarious. But nothing and I mean nothing will make me happier than hearing him talk in circles after the Cavs lay a beatdown on the Celtics and sweep the opening series.

Hate you Pete (jk I kinda love you but 99% of Ohio hates you)

This shirt

 

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Burn it. Enjoy wearing it while we’re in the finals this years, bitches.

Everyone that wears this is the most hateable person on Earth.

Their ugly disgusting accent

 

I don’t know how an entire region could be so dumb. Honestly, the way Bostonians pronounce words is mind boggling. Like, they have no regards for letters or pronunciation. Do they just not care? Or are they just illiterate? I don’t man, I just don’t know.

I hate the way you talk and probably hate the way you look.

 

They talk shit about teams with a “Big 3” yet if they never had a Big 3 they’d have never won a title

 

Just a typical Boston being Boston thing. Scumbag hypocrisy at it’s finest.

I hate hypocrites.

 

It’s kind of amazing how much I didn’t mind Marcus Smart until writing this post. He’s got Joakim Noah and Miguel Cabrera level of hatred right now. Speaking of Joakim Noah, THAT hatred list is going to be fun to do (if we end up facing them)

 

I leave you with the best video I’ve ever laid eyes on