So last night on Twitter after the Indians had lost their fourth straight game, I decided to try and rev up a little discussion about the Browns and the upcoming NFL Draft. Ya know, something to get our minds off of the Tribe and how shitty they’ve been playing lately. I tried to spark up some conversation and  get a feel on what the fine people of Cleveland wanted their football team to do on Thursday. Little did I know what I was walking into. I unexpectedly walked right into a giant spiderweb filled with sarcastic assholes (my favorite type of asshole).

The answers ranged everywhere from serious answers like “Leonard Williams” to “Does it matter?” to “Colt McCoy”

Also, if you’re not following @Bottlegate on Twitter, you’re a boob.

Let’s go through the responses:

https://twitter.com/MRuttig67/status/593228575748173825

A couple years ago I would’ve agreed with you. Not this year. Don’t want “RG-ME” (cc:pftcommeter) on my team.

https://twitter.com/MarronMatt/status/593228914996056065

Can Scott Atchison fill the A gap and make a tackle behind the line of scrimmage? Can Cody Allen catch a punt?

Got a decent amount of Indians responses which I wasn’t expecting at all.

Agreed. Football players who are on the football field are generally a good thing.

https://twitter.com/M_Bauer10/status/593229686890717185

Two very good qualifications to have if you want to play in today’s NFL.

Low blow, bro. Low blow.

https://twitter.com/huffer_24/status/593229728582115328

Really trying to convince myself that I don’t want DGB and I can’t do it. I want him and I want him bad. Sorry, some men just want to watch the world burn.

https://twitter.com/thespazdawg/status/593229886501818369

He’s probably a little too old & slow right now but can you imagine Perk at DT or DE about 6-7 years ago? THAT would be fun.

https://twitter.com/nolreb937/status/593230229725843456

What’s one more quarterback? Bring him in!

Another quarterback? SIGN HIM UP!

https://twitter.com/j_spacek/status/593231249998753793

Have you guys seen Coach Blatt’s daughters? Not bad. Not bad at all. (related: I actually have no idea if these are his daughters but this pic is floating around Twitter and everyone assumes they’re his daughters so they’re his daughters)

https://twitter.com/fieds69/status/593232608382820352

True. Tim Couch has a wayyy brighter future than Donovan McNabb. Also another quarterback. BRING HIM IN!

Big, strong, good hands. Used to the cold midwest weather. BRING HIM IN!

https://twitter.com/msms792012/status/593233828316991488

DING DING DING!

Now we get into 3 of the more depressing responses of the night:

Yes. But no. But yes. It does matter. I need a new jersey.

Damn. That one hit all 3 teams at once. Not gonna lie, this stung a bit. Not sure if 48 beers are enough.

And now for the most depressing response of the whole night:

https://twitter.com/cycle_jim/status/593228680765267968

What makes this so depressing is that it’s probably true.

See you Thursday!!!