Browns-Ravens game 3 preview

September 20, 2014 Mike Leave a comment

What: Baltimore Ravens @ Cleveland Browns

When: Sunday 1 pm

Vegas Odds: Ravens (-2) OVER/UNDER 42

The Ravens and the Browns both come into this game at 1-1 with both teams winning last week. The Ravens steamrolled the shit out of the Steelers on Thursday Night Football 26-6. In an emotional game Joe Flacco threw for a pedestrian 166 yards, Bernard Pierce ran for 96, and Steve Smith caught 6 passes for 71 yards. The Ravens Defense forced 2 fumbles and held the Steelers to just 301 yards of total offense.

The Browns are riding high after Billy Cundiff kicked a late game winning field goal to beat Drew Brees and the New Orleans Saints 26-24. Brian Hoyer threw for 204 yards and a TD, Terrance the Towson Tiger West rushed for 68 yards and a TD, and receiver Andrew Hawkins led the Browns with 6 catches for 70 yards and the crucial catch on the Browns final drive. The Browns defense returned a Drew Brees interception for a touchdown.

WHAT TO WATCH FOR

Can the Browns handle success?

There’s that old saying **“Everybody has success but only a few know what to do with it.”** Will the Browns be able to build off last weekend’s emotional win and come out with a win over the stolen Browns Ravens? Or will they come out flat like they did in the first game vs. Pittsburgh? If the Browns can jump out to a quick lead, I don’t think the Ravens will be able to dig themselves out of that hole.

Teacher vs. Mentor

Mike Pettine was an outside linebackers coach for the Ravens under Jim Harbaugh. Kyle Shanahan was the offensive coordinator for the Houston Texans who were coached by current Ravens OC Gary Kubiak. I’m sure hours upon hours of film study were spent on the tendencies of the former coaching partners. It really doesn’t matter though, our coach can beat up your coach.

Ravens receiver/Browns cornerback matchup

Do you put Joe Haden on Torrey Smith or Steve Smith? It’s well documented that Haden struggles against the smaller, shifty, receievers. If I’m defensive coordinator Jim O’Neil I put Justin Gilbert/Buster Skrine on Stever Smith and leave Joe on an island with Torrey Smith.

Can Hoyer get to 5-1 as a starter?

His good hasn’t been great but his bad hasn’t been awful. If Hoyer can manage the game, hit the open receivers, and not have any turnovers I think we win this game. This Ravens defense isn’t what it used to be so there’ll definitely be opportunities to score. If Brian throws for 240+ yards with no turnovers the Browns have a very good shot at winning this game.

Will the crowd be as effective as it was last Sunday?

The crowd was deafening last Sunday forcing Drew Brees to burn a couple timeouts and confused the Saints offense at the line of scrimmage. If the crowd isn’t taken out of the game early expect the Dawg Pound to be an absolute madhouse. I hear the Ravens talk a lot of shit to the fans before the game. If there’s one thing I know about Browns fans it’s that they don’t take any shit and that they’ll give it right back. I fully expect Steve Smith to be a main target of the heckling and when the game is over expect Smith to claim the title of “Most Hated Raven.”

What can we expect out of Swagger?

Word on the street is that Swagger HATES birds and especially hates Ravens. Expect him to be running around the field all fired up with flames of hate in his eyes. Here’s to hoping he leaves Terrell Suggs a nice little brown present in his helmet and gives Terrell this face:

Prediction:

Browns 31 Ravens 20. Browns cover the (+2) spread and the game goes OVER 42.

Trends: Browns are 2-0 against the spread and both of their games have gone OVER

**I totally made that saying up**

Browns

“The Ballad of Brian Hoyer” is just another reason why America laughs at Cleveland

September 20, 2014 Mike Leave a comment

I know I’m probably overreacting here a little bit but I absolutely hate this so much. The song… the song is OK (I laughed at the end) but the general idea of the song and what it stands for is something that I just can’t get behind. See, this is why people make fun of Cleveland. Your quarterback wins 1 game, 1 FUCKING GAME; and the general Cleveland population shits their pants, proclaims him a savior, and suddenly there are actual real life songs written about him. Look, I like Brian Hoyer and want him to go 15-1, win league MVP, and win us a Super Bowl. But there are 24 other NFL teams who have won a game this season. 75% of the league. How many of those teams had songs written about their quarterback after their first win this season? You think New England fans wrote a tribute to Tom Brady after he beat the Vikings last Sunday? You think the cheeseheads from Green Bay wrote a folk song honoring the greatness of Aaron Rodgers? No. They didn’t. Because they know how to handle football success. Let’s act like we’ve been there before. I’m sick of being a laughingstock around the league.

PS- If this was a song about Johnny Manziel I’d totally be telling you about how good the harmony sounds and that it should be up for Record of the Year at the Grammys.

Cleveland

Prisoner in Ashland County jail wakes up and walks right out the front door

September 20, 2014 Ai Leave a comment

From Cleveland.com:

“An inmate who walked out of the Ashland County Jail early Friday by lying to jail security is back in custody.
Ashland County Sheriff Capt. Steven Blake said police in Lexington, Kentucky captured Jeremy M. Williamson, 34, after Blake called a relative from a Speedway gas station there.”

“Williamson changed out of his green prison uniform on Friday and into blue pants and white shirt that signifies someone going to do community service.

Williamson told the guard he was ordered to do the community service about 6:20 a.m. and walked out of the jail.

Williamson was on community service duty in August.”

What. In. The. Fuck. is going on with the Ohio Department of Rehabilitation and Correction right now? A week after the most hated piece of shit in the entire state escaped from prison by CLIMBING A FENCE, this cat pops off his green skivvies, puts on blue pants and a white tee and walks right out the front door of the place. Are those not like the first two escape plans outlined in the handbook for prison guarding? “Step 1: While inside the prison, do not let prisoners walk out of the front door. Step 2: While outside the prison, do not let prisoners climb any fences.” Literally the only place these scummies can go in those two situations, aka the only two situations they’re ever in. I just can’t wrap my head around it. Fuck “The Birthplace of Aviation”, I’m rolling with “The Place to Be if You’re Incarcerated”.

Another article from Cleveland.com considers whether budget cuts are to blame for the recent events. I’m not gonna sit here and pretend to be some expert about correctional facilities and state budgets, but I’m pretty fucking sure it’s not a good idea to start pulling staff from guard towers like they have at Allen Oakwood. The fact of the matter is that the amount of work to do in prisons is staying the same, if not growing (these guys are starting to adapt, climbing fences and walking), while the amount of guards to do the work is decreasing.

Toward the end of this long ass article, they suggest a possible solution for prison over-crowding is sending less people to prison. Building new facilities, expanding old ones, hiring more guards, that’s all expensive. I get that. But are we seriously going to say our correctional budget should determine our laws? We can’t afford to hold these guys so Bobby, who is a non-violent offender, is cool now? Air tight logic. Maybe you should ask him nicely for that fifty grand he embezzled and pump it right back into the prison. I could get down with building some less-secure facilities for prisoners like that, which I’m assuming would be cheaper, but they’ll probably go and try to walk out the front door anyway.