Hilarious Cleveland Cop Draws A Dick, Accidentally Gets It On A Ticket, Gets Suspended


From Cleveland.com:

“A dirty doodle left on a traffic ticket landed a Cleveland police officer a 10-day unpaid suspension.

Chief Calvin Williams suspended Officer Vincent Schneider Aug. 28. after the patrolman was found guilty of violating division rules.”

“It is unclear what was depicted in the offending drawing. Northeast Ohio Media Group has requested a copy of the citation.

Police spokesman Sgt. Ali Pillow said Schneider didn’t make the drawing in the citation book, but the pen pressure transferred the lewd sketch onto a blank citation’s carbon copy. Another officer issued a traffic ticket that contained the lewd impression.”


I’m not even mad at you, Chief Williams. Just disappointed. The Browns kicked ass on Sunday, Corey Kluber is going to win the god damn Cy Young award and the best basketball player on the face of the planet is back where he belongs. This is the greatest time to be a Clevelander since I don’t even know when….and you go and do this.

Vincent probably drew up a fake ticket with a dick on it to throw under his buddy’s windshield wiper and freak him out. If you don’t think that’s hilarious then I seriously question your commitment to the people of Cleveland and more importantly the male gene. Drawing dicks is a timeless tradition among the people who don them. You should suspend yourself ten days for dishonoring that.

Changed my mind. I am mad at you. Earlier this year a different Cleveland cop was suspended 25 days for sending a picture of his ACTUAL dick (!) and Facebook stalking a chick he only knew existed because he wrote her a ticket once. So let’s recap: Vinny Schneids accidentally drew a fake dick that I’m gonna go ahead and assume wasn’t a caricature of his own dick that got on a ticket he didn’t even give out (a different cop did, which adds a whole nother level of hilarity to this), boom ten days no pay. Thomas Tewell sends a real life nudie on purpose and harasses a girl over the internet and gets 25. If you guys really think that was an accurate punishment, my boy Vinny should have gotten a promotion. Chief Vincent Schneider. Has a ring to it, no?

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