Tag Archives: Cedar Point

Here’s Leaked Video of The New Rollercoaster at Cedar Point And It Looks Absolutely Nuts

From Cleveland.com

SANDUSKY, Ohio – Coaster fans across the country are having a hard time containing their excitement: Increasing evidence points to the opening next year of a record-breaking dive coaster at Cedar Point.

Computerized images of a coaster called Valravn appeared on several Internet sites over the weekend, reportedly taken from a Cedar Point phone app, which has since been disabled.

Cedar Point spokesman Bryan Edwards declined to comment on the images. But Robb Alvey, who runs the website Theme Park Review, said the images are credible.

Well holy shit. Cedar Point already boasts 16 (or is it 17?) awesome rollercoasters and this one is no different.  Don’t really have any idea what a “Dive Coaster” is but I know this seems like one of those rides where you’ll gladly wait in line for 3 hours in 85 degree heat while losing 5 lbs of water weight because you’re sweating so much. For me there’s only 2 rides in the park that justify that long of a wait; Millennium Force and Maverick. Those are the top 2 and if you disagree you’re wrong. Top Thrill is cool but there’s all that waiting for what, 15 seconds of action and then you’re done? All that build up for a fun, fast, ride that leaves you wanting more. Hm. Sounds like we’re talking about a completely different subject here.

Here are my official power rankings for best rides in the park because I know you all are DYING to know.

Tier 1

  • Millennium Force (GOAT)
  • Maverick

Tier 2

  • Top Thrill Dragster
  • Magnum (A classic)
  • Max Air (underrated, best non coaster in the park)

Tier 3

  • Raptor
  • Gatekeeper
  • Rougarou (Mantis killed your nuts)
  • Witches Wheel (don’t hate)
  • Wicked Twister
  • Skyhawk

Tier 4

  • Power Tower
  • Corkscrew (only because there’s usually no line)
  • Mean Streak (ALWAYS walk away with a sore back)
  • Gemini
  • Windseeker

Cedar Point announces it’s keeping The Mantis. Weird because Bottlegate told you this 3 weeks ago.

I mean I don’t want to pump my tires too much but who was the first one to say The Mantis was sticking around at Cedar Point? That Cedar Point was trying to pull a fast one on all of us by saying they’re tearing down a rollercoaster that’s not even 20 years old?

People laughed. People scoffed. I was turned into a punching bag. A laughingstock. “Mike you idiot, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” “Mike don’t quit your day job.” But I kept my head down and kept chuggin along because that’s just how I’m wired. I didn’t give up and took the advice of the one and only J. Biebs and I said “Never Say Never.” I was backed into a corner but I always knew deep down in my heart of hearts that one day I’d be exonerated. And that day is today.

Now it’s technically not “The Mantis” because they’re changing it from a stand up, testicle busting coaster to a sit down, floorless coaster. They’re also changing the name and calling it “Rougarou” which in French folklore is/was a werewolf creature who prowled the swamps of New Orleans, Louisiana. Great decision by Cedar Point. Stand up rollercoasters SUCK.

(If anyone was wondering, the werewolf is BY FAR the best mythical monster. Fuck Twilight and Edward and Bella. #TeamJacob till I die.)

See, this is the kind of hard hitting stuff you’ll find here on Bottlegate. We’re not going to bore you with statistics and numbers till your eyes fall out. We’ll entertain you, make you laugh, cry, smile, and make you think. We’re more than just a box score. What other “sports” site in Cleveland will have your back like Bottlegate will? Answer: None.

Here’s my original post on Cedar Point and The Mantis

You’ll see that the post was about 97% right. If Cedar Point didn’t bitch out with not naming the coaster after Lebron, that 97% becomes 100%.

Take a virtual ride on Rougarou

Cedar Point says it’s closing The Mantis. Cedar Point must think we’re idiots.

SANDUSKY, Ohio — Cedar Point announced Tuesday the closing of one of its rides with a cryptic YouTube video. In it, troubled guests scream, “Why would you do this?!” as the Grim Reaper roams through the park. The video reveals “Mantis gets squashed Oct. 19.”

You’re kidding right? How many people actually believe the Mantis is closing forever? 4? 5? Um, hello does no one remember this tweet from Cedar Point in July?

But then I put on my Google Search hard hat and dug a little deeper:

And I found this quote from Bryan Edwards, the PR Manager at Cedar Point talking about how they would rename the coaster- “We haven’t really determined to what degree we would do it,” Mr. Edwards said. “It could be just a fun weekend renaming, or rename a coaster for the season, or perhaps at the end of the year, rename one permanently”

“A fun weekend renaming.”  “Perhaps at the end of the year.”

That’s all you need to read right there, guys. Anything big happening around October 19th? Anyone have a season starting around then? Any big athlete making a return? The Cavs season starts October 30th. What better way for Cedar Point to gain some publicity and good PR than to have the renaming of their coaster coincide with the beginning of arguably the most anticipated season in Ohio sports history? You think that’s just a coincidence?

Pretty sure little ol’ Bottlegate.com just scooped everyone in America.

My guess is it’s called “Return of The King” and I bet Lebron is even in attendance.