Tag Archives: baseball

I Tried To Eat 9 Hot Dogs And Drink 9 Beers During A 9 Inning Baseball Game

The 9/9/9 challenge. 9 beers 9 hot dogs 9 innings.

On the surface it doesn’t seem that tough, right? 9 beers over the course of 3 hours? In my sleep. 9 hot dogs? Tough but doable. Combining the two just seems like it wouldn’t be that hard. With the right strategy it could be done. It wouldn’t be easy, but it could be done.

I’ve seen this challenge floating around Twitter before and recently Barstool mentioned it. Here’s Katie Nolan trying it back when she was with Guyism in 2013:

 

So last Friday night’s Indians game v the Oakland Athletics would be the day.

I got downtown around 6:30 at my buddy’s place and we’d Uber over to Progressive Field just in time to make it by first pitch because we’d need every second that we could get. If I’m housing 9 beers and 9 dogs I want to make sure I take advantage of the timing aspect of it.

From the beginning I was fucked:

Gridlocked on the way to the game. Cars everywhere. The only good thing was that I was able to catch a few Pokemon in the backseat of the Uber while we were sitting on Euclid.

We’d have to try and get a beer or dog in us as quickly as possible so we stopped at City Tap and caught a quick inning or so there

Official start time for 9/9/9: 7:30 pm

That pic was snapped at 7:31 pm and the first pitch was thrown at 7:10. I was already 20+ minutes behind and I hadn’t even stepped foot in the ballpark yet.

Once we got into the Prog it was full steam ahead and we made a beeline to the dollar hot dog guy who let it be know that there was no limit on number of hot dogs you could buy. This guy was the best.

We (I use we because I was with my friend Will who has actually sometimes occasionally writes a Cavs article for this site) set up shop on a garbage can next to the women’s restroom (sup) and went to town on some dollar dogs. We each put down 4 dogs within the first 10 or so minutes inside of the ballpark.

Here’s where my strategy got messed up. I tried to keep everything equal.

Ex: If I had 4 dogs, I’d try and be on beer #4

5 dogs, 5 beers etc.

In hindsight I don’t think this was the best strategy. After about an hour the hot dogs built up and mixed with the beer and by the 6th inning I felt like I had an anvil in my stomach. I felt like the blobfish. If you’re going to try this at home I suggest getting 6 or 7 hot dogs down right off the bat. That way you can just coast to 9 beers if you keep up a good pace.

1 hour and 10 minutes into the challenge I wasn’t feeling too great.

Needed some motivation. Reached out to the loyal Twitter followers to give me a little push. If the thought of a dead gorilla doesn’t get you juiced up then you, my friend, do not have a pulse.

6 minutes until the final out and this is all I had left:

I poured that Budweiser in a cup and it was gut check time.

BUT

I couldn’t get it all down

2 little hot dog nubs stood between me and immortality. God dammit.

The Joey Chestnut method of dipping my hot dogs in the beer proved to be gross and ineffective

 

A couple things:

  • If I get a full 9 innings (from first pitch to the Indians batting in the bottom of the 9th) I complete this challenge no problem.
  • According to baseball-reference.com the official game time last Friday night was 2 hours and 59 minutes. Shorter than the 2016 MLB average of 3 hours and 26 seconds. Another thing not working in my favor.
  • I’ll just be honest- Dollar hot dogs taste like they’re worth a dollar.
  • Last Friday I went to the Pizza Hut by my work and had their pizza buffet. TERRIBLE idea. It’s not smart to eat 8 pieces of pizza for lunch when you’re doing an eating challenge later that night. Next time I attempt the 9/9/9 I’ll be on a strict diet leading up to that night’s game.
  • I shoved the last 2 bites of the hot dogs in my mouth right after the 3rd and final out of the game was completed. Unfortunately the judges said this wasn’t allowed.
  • The 2 guys I was with completed it and I was the only one who didn’t so my confidence is a little shook right now.
  • I will be trying this again this season and I will be completing it.

 

 

 

 

A minor league first baseman struck out Nick Swisher last night

From lehighvalleylive.com:

Lehigh Valley IronPigs manager Dave Brundage came to Brock Stassi in the dugout in the seventh inning of Thursday night’s game at Coca-Cola Park. The IronPigs were trailing Scranton/Wilkes-Barre 10-1, and after having to use the bullpen for 13 of the last 18 innings of baseball, Brundage was looking for help.

Brundage called on Stassi to toe the rubber in the ninth inning, with the RailRiders’ 4-5-6 batters due up.

Stassi punched out Slade Heathcott on six pitches to begin his outing. Then, Swisher walked to the plate.

The first pitch was a strike, low in the zone. The second and third were balls, one high and the other outside. Swisher fouled the fourth pitch, before the fifth came in low and inside for ball three.

Stassi had seen Swisher mash plenty of baseballs before. On a 3-2 count, he wasn’t serving up a fastball.

“That’s why I threw him a 3-2 curveball,” Stassi said, “cause if I threw him a fastball, I figured it was coming back at me.”

The looping breaking ball dropped into the bottom of strike zone at a slow-motion 69 mph. Swisher watched it go by. Umpire Ryan Additon called strike three.”


I was gonna start out the blog with “oh, how the mighty have fallen” but this is more of the mighty’s outstretched hand falling to the ground from one last grasp at hope after lying down helplessly since 2013.

Do yourself a favor and read the full article from Greg Joyce (@GJoyce9). He had me on the edge of my seat, feeling like I was watching this clash of the titans unfold with my own two eyeballs.

“Then, Swisher walked to the plate.

This was the former major league All-Star Nick Swisher, the World Series-champion Nick Swisher, the one who has hit 245 homers in 1,527 big-league games and is now trying to get back there while playing for the Yankees’ Triple-A club.

“Just don’t leave the ball up and get yourself hurt,” Stassi thought to himself.

Just beautiful storytelling.

That face you make when you just struck out looking against a first baseman that was drafted in the 33rd round and hasn’t gotten a big league at-bat in 5 professional seasons with the Philadelphia Phillies but you’re still making $15 million this season

swishheader

“I guess that’s a feather I can put in my cap,” Stassi said with a chuckle.

KEEP THE CHIEF, BROCK

 

VIDEO: Milwaukee Brewers minor leaguer has a laugh like you’ve never heard before

Laugh/screech/just-open-your-mouth-and have-no-noise-come-out-of-it out loud funny. Hysterical. Like watching an Always Sunny blooper reel, the laughter is involuntary. I don’t think it is, but even if this was an act by Brett Phillips, keep it up and never stop.

The caption on that second video clip pretty much sums it up perfectly. “Laughs like a streaming video that freezes but the sound keeps going.”

To top it off, turns out Phillips is kind of a boss. Former 6th round pick, was a Top 10 prospect in the Astros organization before being sent to Milwaukee in the Carlos Gomez trade. He’s battling to start in center field for the Brewers this year, and his name is Maverick Phillips on Twitter. Play on, playa.

phillips1