Tag Archives: Cleveland

Things were thrown, boundaries were crossed in Tower City food court fight

Now, admittedly I haven’t been to Tower City in quite some time. Used to go as a kid before Indians games. I remember getting my body weight in sugary goodness at that candy store back by Gamestop and grabbing a mean ass steak at Morton’s like once a year. There was a small riffraff presence back then but nothing that wasn’t manageable with some simple route planning ahead of time.

Holy. S. This place has taken a nosedive. A once thriving (kinda) utopia (not really) has deteriorated to the point where customers are throwing objects at workers and Asians are standing on counter tops. Food court Chinese is probably my favorite thing in the world, too (Sakura in the 4th Street Arcade or GTFO.) This video makes me sad.

Also, I hope this doesn’t come off as racist cause that’s 1000% not my intent, but I did not get one single word from that entire exchange from the restaurant workers. Not one. “OK!” about 30 seconds in was it. The high pitched screaming is just not a dialect my brain can process I guess. Like Mr. Kim yelling at Sun-Li in Always Sunny.

As Mike would say…let’s take a look at the game tape.

1.0

Here we have a man requesting his money back for food I’m going to assume was contaminated. Think I caught something towards the end about rats or roaches or something. We do start out relatively civil. Outside voices, possibly, but the gentleman is simply asking to be reimbursed for a sub-par product.

1.1

“No.”

1.2

Ladies and gentlemen, the point of no return. Rule #1 of mall Chinese food: never touch the “Thank you, please” tip cup. Foolish.

1.3

And here we begin the aerial assault. Cups, napkins, pots and pans. Thank the good lord upstairs there were no small children within reach of this woman.

1.4

Tag team, back again.

1.5

This guys in full-out temper tantrum mode now. Just flailing his limbs, looking to make contact with anything and everything. I can guarantee with 100% certainly he’s broken his hand punching a wall before.

1

There are some boundaries in life that, once you cross, you can never go back. The food court counter is one of them. Nevertheless, like Ron Artest jumping into the stands on that fateful night in Michigan, this man must defend his honor.

2

The President of the United States marching to the situation room to “give the order” in every political drama ever made.

3

And his Chief of Staff.

4

And it’s at this point that homebody realized he bit off more than he could chew. Definitely did not count on these two maniacs jumping the counter and following him away from the scene. “I gotta get to work.” = “Mommyyyyyyy!”

5

These last two pictures remind me a whole lot of the only fight I’ve ever been in but I won’t say which person I am in this situation. Except I was covered in snow. And I’m not the girl.

6

“Hold me back bro!”

Huge News- Some Bars In Cleveland Will Be Open Till 4 AM During The Republican National Convention

WKYC

CLEVELAND — The Republican National Convention will be a blend of work and play.

And the partying for the Republicans will be allowed to go longer in qualifying local bars and restaurants that serve alcohol.

Under a new Ohio law, holders of most Ohio liquor permits are eligible for a waiver during a “major event” from the Ohio Division of Liquor Control.

The law impacts Columbus and Cleveland, and the RNC qualifies as a major event.

The establishments must be in Cuyahoga County or the six counties surrounding it, Geauga, Lake, Lorain, Medina, Portage and Summit.

The waiver will allow alcohol to be served until 4 a.m. It will run from Sunday, July 17 to Thursday, July 21.


 

B🅾🅾🅾🅾🅾🅾🅾🅾🅾M!!!!!

Cleveland is basically New York City and you can’t tell me any different.

2 extra hours of drinking and debauchery + Repulicans + Donald Trump = Best weekend in Cleveland EVER!!! I mean, what could go wrong?

Now the big question is what time do you actually go out? Normally my friends and I will leave for the bars at around 11 on a Friday or Saturday night. Go to the bars for about 3 hours, drink (heavily), and then get a whole pizza for ourselves from Panini’s. I don’t think 11-4 AM would be feasible. I’m not 22 anymore. This old man needs his rest.

Circling this weekend on my calendar. The summer of 2016 is going to be so awesome.

Sucks that Manziel won’t be around to take advantage of the Barley House back room till 4. (low hanging fruit I know, I know)

Let’s play the overreaction game!

In case you haven’t heard, the Cavs lost to the Warriors last night. It was an overall embarrassing effort from the home team, and it made a few things quite clear:

  1. David Blatt needs to be fired
  2. We shouldn’t have traded Andrew Wiggins for Kevin Love
  3. We should cut Kevin Love
  4. Let’s egg Kevin Love’s house
  5. LeBron is no longer The King
  6. LeBron’s short term as The Prince has ended
  7. How much longer can LeBron hold on to his title as The Peasant?
  8. Go Browns

So, in light of the most devastating loss in the history of professional sports, I thought I would take a look back at some of the other times we, as a human race, have had informed, rational thoughts about a team or individual.

2015 Mike Trout

trout

Mike Trout had a “down” year in 2014. He posted career lows in batting average and WAR, on top of career highs in strikeouts, K% and UZR. So basically, he couldn’t hit anymore and he could no longer play defense. Fast forward to September of 2015. He’s batting below .300. Bryce Harper is posting MVP numbers and is nipping at Trout’s heels as the best young outfielder in the game. The seventh of the month rolls around. Angels vs Dodgers. The Battle for Los Angeles. Cy Young-hopeful Zack Greinke takes the bump for the boys in blue. Mike Trout went to the plate five times that night. He recorded zero hits and struck out three times. Harper had gone 7-14 with 3 bombs the previous 3 games. Trout was destined to limp off into the annals of history.

He would go on to finish 2nd in the American League MVP voting and lead the league in WAR.

2013-current New England Patriots

The loss to Denver in 2013 AFC Championship game had the Patriots on their heels. After falling to Belichick & Co. in Week 12 that year, Peyton Manning was able to end Brady’s Superbowl aspirations for the second time in their careers while simultaneously ending one of the greatest runs by a football franchise in recent memory. The hangover carried over into 2014. The Patriots started the season 2-2 and were absolutely mollywhopped Week 4 in Kansas City  on Monday Night Football. Tom Brady was mercifully benched at the end of that game, leaving some to wonder if it was finally Jimmy Garoppolo time in New England. “On to Cincinnati,” Bill Belichick famously muttered over and over in his post game press conference. On to Cincinnati indeed. And then on to winning 23 of their next 25 games, including Super Bowl XLIX. They started 2015 with ten wins in a row, despite a certain pigskin controversy that left their starting quarterback (still Brady) suspended then unsuspended. A stumble to the finish line raised more question marks however, after losing four of their last six and dealing with injuries to their starting running back and two of their top wide receivers.

The Patriots beat the Kansas City Chiefs 27-20 last weekend and will square off once again with Peyton Manning’s Broncos in the AFC Championship.

Apple

apple

I don’t really remember the movie but I’m pretty sure the company stunk so they fired Steve Jobs, the company continued to stink but Steve Jobs didn’t, the company brought back Steve Jobs and now the company doesn’t stink.

The once stinky company is now one of the most valuable companies on the planet.

Matthew McConaughey

mccc

His last name may have been hard to spell, but his on-screen appeal was easy to see. Matty Mc began his career with a cult classic in Dazed and Confused, as well as action/drama bangers such as Contact, U-571 & A Time to Kill. Shortly after that, however, McConaughey’s career took a turn for the worse. He began winning/being nominated for awards such as “Sexiest Love Scene” and “Move Liplock” around the time of The Wedding Planner in 2002. By the time Ghost of Girlfriends Past was released in 2009, he was all but six feet under in the romcom graveyard. After a hiatus from awards and watchable movies, a (probably shirtless) epiphany helped Matt rise from the ashes like the Phoenix around 2012. Since then, he has appeared in testosterone-riddled masterpieces such as Mud, Dallas Buyers Club, The Wolf of Wall Street, Interstellar and of course True Detective.

The McConaissance is real.


See? There were some rough spots, but Mike Trout is still one of the best players in baseball, the Patriots are still a dynasty, Apple is still running the world, I still wouldn’t kick McConaughey out of bed for eating crackers…and the Cavs are still one of the best teams in the National Basketball Association.