Four Year Old Falls Into The Gorilla Exhibit At Cincy Zoo And Lives

Video from a zoo goer

https://twitter.com/Amber_Soler/status/736785301079629825

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Scary situation down in Cincy over the weekend when a 4 year old fell into the gorilla exhibit at the zoo. I can’t even imagine what the parents of this kid were thinking as he was being grabbed by the gorilla who probably outweighs him by 400 lbs. This is legit probably one of the more terrifying things I’ve watched on the Internet.

But here’s the thing that no one is mentioning- this kid now has an AWESOME story to tell for the rest of his life. He can now one up everyone everytime he’s sitting with his buddies. “Oh, your dad played professional baseball? Cool story, bro. I stared into the eyes of a Silverback when I was 4 and lived to tell about it.”

He won’t even need pick up lines. For the rest of his life he’ll be known as the kid who went toe to toe with a gorilla and came out victorious. He’ll be the real life “The Boy Who Lived.”

Now obviously if the boy ends up with a permanent disability or injury this story is incredibly, incredibly sad, but everything I’ve read makes it sound like he’ll be OK. He’s incredibly lucky if he walked away with a couple bruises and maybe a broken bone or two. Unfortunately the gorilla had to be shot which absolutely sucks.

Indians Fans Constructed A Big Ass Beer Pyramid In Right Field Last Night

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(pic via my good friend Tom)

 

While the Cavs were putting a beatdown on that team from Canada last night, Indians fans were drinking Miller Lite. And drinking. And drinking. Lots of Miller Lite.

#MakeBaseballFunAgain

See, this is what we do in Cleveland. We drink. Indians game? Drink. Muni Lot? Drink. Sister’s high school graduation? Yep, drink. Grandma’s wake at a funeral home? Drink in the parking lot to be respectful.

I can’t even begin to fathom the skill and dexterity it took to build that beauty. There’s so many outside factors that could have contributed to it toppling over too- wind, bugs, unruly fans, the burning glares of baseball “purists” who hate fun. It took a lot of expertise to build that beer pyramid, but also a lot of luck too.

Kudos to whomever constructed that tower. I’ll join you in building the next one.

Cleveland