All posts by Ai

Armed with a baseball bat & meat-wrapped brick, Springfield man goes postal on neighbors

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From Cleveland.com:

“SPRINGFIELD TOWNSHIP, Ohio — A Springfield Township man is jailed after he smashed three-dozen of his neighbors’ windows with a baseball bat and threw a meat-wrapped brick into a one of the homes, police said.

Timothy Ambach, 43, is charged with two counts of felony vandalism. His bond was set at $10,000 Tuesday at his first appearance in Akron Municipal Court.

Ambach became angry at his neighbors believing they were somehow involved in a motorcycle theft at his Angelterre Boulevard home, Springfield Township Police Sgt. Eric East said.

He broke 34 windows on the residents’ homes, garages and cars. The amount of damage has yet to be totaled but court records say it was more than $10,000. The car at one home was totaled. 

Ambach smashed several large windows and 11 garage windows at his next-door neighbor’s home. He also threw the brick wrapped in meat inside a plastic bag through one window.”

The state of Ohio is a lot of things, friends. But a place that prevents criminals from spreading their creative wings is not one of them.

We had a prisoner escape jail by simply walking out the front door last September. The “fucking commander”, who is not a Cleveland police officer, flashed a Cleveland police badge in order to get out of a $2.25 bus fare a month later. We’ve got strangers hiding in vans and punching women in the stomach, gangsters dropping air conditioning units on 50-year-olds and fugitives on the run for half a century. Ohio is the Silicon Valley of the criminal underworld.

And just when you think you’ve seen it all…..ladies and gentlemen, Timothy Ambach. Unless there’s some cultural reference I’m unaware of, wrapping a brick in meat and firing it through your neighbor’s window is without a doubt the most incredible thing I’ve ever read. The thought process that led up to the weaponization of beef is something I will forever dream about experiencing. He’s the John Nash of temper tantrums. The Isaac Newton of hysterics. Timmy’s the goddamn professor of pandemonium, and class is in session. His fury is next-level.

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PS Police found two pot plants inside his house afterwards. He was also arrested in May for having an unloaded gun and a jar of Mary Jane in his passenger seat after being pulled over.

You broke my heart, Timothy. You broke my heart.

True Detective Reddit Recap: S2 E4 “Down Will Come”

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Episode 1: The Western Book of the Dead

Episode 2: Night Finds You

Episode 3: Maybe Tomorrow


 Well that sure escalated quickly. After 50 minutes of dialogue and plot advancement, last night’s episode ended with two guys, a girl and a shootout. Predictably, the big three were the last ones standing after a bunch of cholo’s open-fired on their squad before they even had a chance to say hello. Velcoro’s dumpy partner bit the dust, as well as probably a half dozen cops and 20 or so “protesters”. I thought it was pretty well done. Most tense scene the show has had since Carcosa and the tracking scene from Season 1.

Question/tidbits:

  • Probably the biggest question from this episode is “Who tipped off the pimps?” The fact that they were fired upon immediately after arriving at the building in the final scene certainly suggests that the gangsters were expecting company. And the awkwardness between the higher ups and the team during the briefing beforehand (the mayor’s “Be careful out there,” the lieutenant asking if they needed that much manpower, plus the fact that the Vinci PD wanted the Caspere investigation to go towards the pimps anyway) lends itself to that theory. We know the Mayor has a vendetta against Ani ever since she went to his house. However there’s a lot of Redditors that are of the opinion that the Mayor is too obvious and he isn’t the one calling the shots. I tend to agree with them. “I live among you…well disguised” from the opening credits. The Mayor is about as well disguised as Shaquille O’Neal at Chuck E. Cheese.
  • Sticking with that last scene, it was interesting to see how all three characters reacted to it. Ani was clearly shaken up and almost vomits when the dust settles. Ray shows less than that, but even he is shaking during those final moments where the pimp is holding the hostage. But Paul seems completely comfortable and at home. For someone who has been struggling with his identity all season, sexually and otherwise, he seemed almost enchanted by the whole thing.

  • That quick exchange with Frank, his wife and what seemed to be a groundskeeper? About the avocado trees not growing? Avocado comes from the Aztec word for “testicle”. The guy said the soil was infertile, which to me implies that Frank’s wife is the problem and not him. (/u/toaka)
  • Dixon’s request of Ray from earlier this season:

(/u/TheMannam)

Welp he’s dead now, so does Ray follow through and go through his stuff for him? And if so, does he find the photos Dixon took of Paul and his Army lover? And if he does, what does he do with them? I have to imagine that situation happens, I don’t see the point in even showing him taking them if you’re just going to kill him off the next episode and they never see the light of day.

  • I gotta say, I’m pretty close to jumping on the “the dialogue in this show absolutely blows” train. I like the idea that Nic intentionally has Frank use million dollar words in an effort to overcompensate for his masculine and, well, professional shortcomings. I do. But it doesn’t really make sense to me when Ani gives her sister the “memories recognize you” speech. And it makes even less sense when her sister (a hooker, sorry, “online performer”) articulates “You couldn’t even be there for yourself” back at her. And don’t get me started on Frank’s henchman and some of the other minor characters. I’m not boarding the train just yet but how much are tickets?
  • The watch at the pawn shop and the picture of the watch that was stolen from Caspere do most certainly not match up.

(/u/mcsmif)

Yet Paul says that they do, and they even find fingerprints on it. Is this just an oversight by the show? Was Paul so flustered that he didn’t notice the difference? Probably not. The fingerprints seem to point to this all being a setup, just like the final scene. And possibly that Dixon was a part of it. He gave Paul a long stare at the pawn shop when he initially identifies the watch as a match to the photo.

Reddit Theories:

(/u/gideonpilgrim)

Hey, Frank:

(/u/heisenberg_jr)

Cleveland.com Comments of the Week: 7/12/15

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During my daily peruse for content on Cleveland.com, I sift through some of the comments and save a handful to share with you all once a week. So when you’re hungover and clinging to life on a Sunday morning, come on over to Bottlegate and let us talk you off the ledge.

Previous weeks: 6/21/156/28/157/6/15

Akron man found guilty of stabbing landscaper over grass clippings

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Kevin Love graces the cover of ESPN The Magazine’s ‘Body Issue,’ wants to play until he’s 40

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Ariana Grande investigated for licking doughnuts at Calif. shop while trashing America

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Brunswick man accused of hitting another man in face with golf club

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Don’t kiss your chickens, CDC warns

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